Meredith Cagen is Guilty as Charged - Book Tour Stop

Guilty As Charged

When I was younger, I had a relationship that broke my heart. Adverbs, adjectives and accolades did not do him justice. He was the perfect man. No matter how many times he showed his true colors, I was steadfast in my belief that he was perfect. I languished in my illusion (actually delusion) of his perfection. I was in love.

I didn’t know what to do. There was no expert who could guide me. No published Q & A pertinent for my situation. I searched for a plan, a guidebook, and a path to success: how I can get the storybook ending with Mr. Perfect.

Every “what not to do while dating” offense a girl can make, I embarrassingly did. I was available to him. I telephoned him. I was the one who initiated contact, demonstrating my interest as if he had doubts. Running to see him when he beckoned, accepting his last minute dates and last minute cancellations. Worse, I accepted his lies, I had no self respect. I threw myself at him. I was insane! Where were my friends when I obviously needed them? An intervention was needed but no one restrained me.

Unwilling to consider the possibility of his rejection, I changed myself to meet his requirements.
Yes, Mr. Perfect had criteria. His personal preference was models, blonde skinny models. His office walls were covered with photographs of Mr. Perfect with his choice of arm candy. It was a shrine to his ability to attract these trophy girlfriends. A medium height, curvy size eight brunette (me) didn’t seem to be a worthy enough prize for a man of with his considerable talents.

I tried my best to meet his standards. I dieted, exercised, groomed, and ingratiated myself into his social universe. I attempted to succeed with this game plan. But I committed the biggest sin a girl can. A don’t so whopping that I am banned from giving advice forever. A mistake so huge, there is no known recovery. This dating felony pains me even now, years later. I told him, I was in love with him.

What was wrong with me? The girl police should have come and thrown me directly into jail or a padded cell on the spot. No trial or psych evaluation was necessary.

Crimes Charged: Extreme Stupidity and whatever else is beyond.

Verdict: Guilty.

Sentence: Rejection by Mr. Perfect.
My idiocy haunted me for years. If only I had a second chance. What could (coulda, woulda, shoulda) I have done differently while staying true to myself. In my fantasies, I would still be me, but smarter. What was I thinking during this dark period of being in love? How did I permit myself to act like a fool?

One day, I looked back at my past actions, those silly schemes, attempts at change, and idealistic belief that if I loved him with a pure heart, he would love me back. I started to laugh. It was funny, very funny. Telling this story would be my second chance and shot at redemption

Reality hit me as I lay pen to paper, Mr. Perfection was my upstairs neighbor, he was The Man Upstairs. That was the original title for my book, ‘The Man Upstairs,’ but people thought it was a book about religion.

To this day, I am uncertain what was going through my pathetic naive head during that time. Maybe I wasn’t thinking properly? There are theories that posulate love affects (and obviously impairs) your cognitive thought processes. Next title was ‘What Was I Thinking?’ but people thought that was a self-help book.

My healthy curvy body, thin not emaciated, did not fit into his model sized world. I wasn’t who he wanted, whatever my size. Paroled from my romantic stupidity I realized that the intellectual/emotional connection didn’t exist between us. It is what is on your insides that counts. It’s a cliché but true. The older I get, it’s my sense of humor that gets me through the days and the nights. I love when someone makes me laugh, even if it’s me! I am a Size Eight in a Size Zero World. 

Author's Bio

Meredith Cagen is a working wife and mother living in New York City. She works as a freelance writer and registered nurse. Her family has awarded her the “Queen of the Multi-taskers” title. In her free time she goes to the gym and out to eat.

Meredith returned to school to obtain a Bachelors of Science in Nursing. Finding the subject dry, technical and boring, she had a difficult time focusing on her studies. Easily distracted, and prone to daydreaming, she wrote Size Eight in a Size Zero World.

Meet Lindsay Chandler--a 32 year-old New York City working wife and mother with old-
fashioned values who thinks she's living a fairy tale life (she's not). She's too busy navigating
between her job, husband, home, children, friends and other obligations to acknowledge her
loneliness. Then an unexpected friendship with her upstairs neighbor (he is smart, successful,
sophisticated and sexy-- she's not) unleashes her passion and re-ignites her sparkle.

This liaison causes her to realize what she is missing. Yearning for a storybook ending, she
decides to make changes in her life, embarking on a quest for self re-invention in this hilarious,
witty, heart felt story.

In the tradition of Sex and the City, Size Eight in a Size Zero World, is a modern-day story of a
good girl trying to do the right thing and the wrong thing simultaneously, while remaining true to
herself, whoever that is.

With the help of a believable cast of characters, Lindsay embarks on a plan to better herself and
plight. This novel is a wickedly funny social commentary on the lives of average women in New
York City's posh Upper East Side.

What happens when the road to happily ever after takes an unexpected detour?

Follow Meredith on tour as she continues to talk about her book Size Eight in a Size Zero World.  Meredith's next stop will be at http://lisahaseltonsinterviewsandreviews.blogspot.com  on Aug.  23.  Be sure to leave a comment for your chance to win a copy of her book.

Thank you so much for stopping in Meredith it has been such a pleasure.  Wishing you much success in the future.

Talking on Matters of the Heart with Cissy Hunt

Please give a warm welcome to my guest Cissy Hunt.  She is the author of A Rose Blooms Among The Thorns,  a fictional novel delving into the subject of domestic violence.  This title will take you through the storms of the life of LaRae,  from fear to healing. 

Cissy lives in the Ozark Mountains with her husband.  She loves working in her yard,  and the mountains give her serenity.  She is an ordained minister,  reaching out to help hurting woman,  helping them through the healing process.

Thank you so much for stopping in today Cissy.  I know domestic violence is something most people don't think too much about unless it is effecting their lives in some form.  I appreciate you discussing such a touchy subject.

Cissy Hunt speaks about Domestic Violence:

My book, A Rose Blooms Among the Thorns is a fictional story about a woman's journey from domestic abuse through healing to forgiveness. This book covers a subject matter that is very close to my heart. the subject matter it covers is domestic violence. Domestic violence is the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior perpetrated by an intimate partner against another. It is an epidemic affecting individuals in every community, regardless of age, economic status, race, religion, nationality or educational background. Violence against women is often accompanied by emotionally abusive and controlling behavior, and thus is part of a systematic pattern of dominance and control. Domestic violence results in physical injury, psychological trauma, and sometimes death. The consequences of domestic
violence can cross generations and truly last a lifetime.

Did you know?
One in every four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime. An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year. 85% of domestic violence victims are women. Historically, females have been most often victimized by someone they knew. Females who are 20-24 years of age are at the greatest risk of nonfatal intimate partner violence. Most cases of domestic violence are never reported to the police.

Even though A Rose Blooms Among the Thorns is a fictional book it is taken from my own life experiences. I choose to make it fiction rather than non-fiction because I want every woman that has gone through domestic violence to be able to relate to it. I don't want them to just read about another woman who experience domestic violence. I want them to know that another man is not the answer that healing is their answer.
Jumping into another relationship after domestic violence without healing 90% of the time leads to another abusive relationship. Yet, if they take the time to heal then they can find a new life that does not include domestic violence.

I would like to leave you with this exert from my book.

After stepping to the podium, LaRae looked down at the urn holding Terri's ashes then to the picture displayed on the easel before looking back up and beginning to speak.

"Terri never made it to true womanhood for she was only nineteen years old when she died. She will never know what it means to be a mother or a grandmother because her life was devalued so greatly by
her abuser that it meant nothing to him to take it. Her life was snuffed out instantly with no thought of remorse because her life wasn't her own; it had been taken from her. She had become property not a human being.

Domestic violence and emotional abuse are behaviors used by one person in a relationship to control another. Do you know that every nine seconds a woman is assaulted and battered in this country, and 5.3
million women are abused each year, and that Domestic Violence is the single major cause of injury to women, more than muggings and car accidents combined. Fifty percent of all women murdered in the
United States are killed by a spouse or an intimate partner. Also, over 500,000 women are stalked by an intimate partner each year. An average of about four women per day dies because of domestic violence.

So you see on the day Terri died at the hands of her abuser so did three other women. Three other families in this country lost a mother, a sister, a daughter, an aunt, or a niece.  Terri Carter is not the first nor will she be the last this town will gather together in mourning over. I wish she would be the last, I pray she would be, but until this community starts changing and becoming aware of domestic violence; there will be more victims like Terri. Think about it! The next service could even be held for one of your family members...maybe even one of your daughters."


Thanks again for chatting with us on such an important subject Cissy.  Please visit Cissy's website at http://cissyh.webs.com  for more information about Cissy and her book.  Leave a comment today for your chance to win a copy of A Rose Blooms Among The Thorns or purchase at Amazon.